THE DINNER WAR

Asparagus sits on a bench, draped in his new green leaf-lettuce jacket, hunched over his newspaper. His dark glasses slide down his long face as he lowers the paper to look over it, conspicuously shifting his eyes to all sides. He has tried to cover his new florette with a matching green fedora, but it can't nearly cover its bulk. He glances at his watch. "Nearly 0900 hours... She should be here soon..." he mumbles to himself.

Spinach approaches the rendez-vous spot, wondering how she will know which of the many vegetables at the SaladBowl is C.O. Asparagus. As she rounds the corner of the napkin holder, seeing the hunched shape surrounded by many empty tables - despite it being the breakfast rush - she rolls her eyes and sighs exasperatedly. "Not another one of those..."

Spinach strides up to Asparagus, towering over his seated shape. "What are you DOING?!?" she hisses. "What part of 'be invisible' didn't you understand?!?" Asparagus looks at her, thoroughly confused. "I tried to hide all my defining features!" he replies innocently. She extends her hand toward him. "Give them to me!"

After Asparagus hands over his fedora and sunglasses, Spinach sits across the table from him. The vegetables crowded around the edges of the SaladBowl are now less hesitant to approach the strange Broccoli-headed Asparagus.

"Now then. As I have previously mentioned, our new assignment is to locate the Dinner Guest. Unfortunately, we have to split up for this search, [Scritch...Scratch...Scritch...] as there is much ground to cover. You are to head towards the Buffet[Scritch...Scratch...Scritch...]Table, but you are to avoid the Dinner Roll territory at ALL COSTS. [Scritch...Scratch...Scritch...] It is well known that they have made use of hidden Exploding Ketchup Packets™..."

"Scritch...Scratch...Scritch..."

"WOULD YOU STOP SCRATCHING YOUR FLORETTE?!?" she shrieks. Spinach takes a deep, steadying breath. "If you keep scratching at your procedure scar, you'll rip the cheese cloth right off. If you leave it alone, it should be healed by tomorrow."

Asparagus smiles sheepishly at the other agent and shrugs. "Sorry, it's itchy."

Rolling her eyes, Special Agent Spinach hands over a package containing special navigation tools, a detailed map of the area Asparagus is to search, and a disposable communication device, in case of emergency. "Whatever you do, just don't get lost..." Just as she is about to leave, Spinach turns to Asparagus again, adding, "And don't forget about the Exploding Ketchup Packets™. I had them marked on your map, but I feel the need to remind you anyways..."

With that parting remark, Spinach turns on her heel and leaves in a huff of military efficiency.

Asparagus looks at the wrapped package, then gently puts it aside as the Waiter brings him his breakfast order of MiraculousGrow™.